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Good news, dear reader! Our fearless leader has announced that there is no recession. In fact, Bush’s exact words were, “I don’t think we’re headed into a recession, but there is no question we are in a slowdown.”

Whew! I guess there’s no need to worry about those pesky rising food and fuel prices or those nasty falling home values after all - it’s just an economic slowdown, that’s all. And I don’t know about you, but I am certainly relieved to know that the economic traits I’ve been noticing have no real substance.

I mean, there for a while, I was getting pretty worrie...